A Two Year (Grief) Update
I wrote one of these last year so it feels fitting to write another quick update. This one isn’t gonna be as structured or as formal as the one I wrote last year.
I’m not gonna lie, parts of this second year of grief were much more difficult for me than last year. During the winter, I felt extremely low at times. I’ve continued to learn, struggle and grow into the version of myself I am right now. At this particular moment in time I’m feeling pretty content. I feel proud of myself for how far I’ve come and all of the hard stuff I’ve done.
In the past few months I feel like I’ve regained my sense of self and my personality. I no longer feel like my entire life revolves around grief which is a bittersweet feeling. I also feel incredibly grateful for the people I have in my life and for the fact that I am able to live, breathe and experience the beautiful world we live in ❤
Today, I really felt my Dad’s presence around me. I don’t know how to describe it but I could almost imagine him there doing everything we did together as a family. It felt weird but also strangely comforting in a way. This year, I think I’ve become more spiritual and willing to believe in things like signs and the soul.
Overall, I feel a sense of calm in my life. I know I have a lot to work on but I feel more confident in myself in general. With the way the world is moving, I am pretty sure that life isn’t going to be super easy but I think I am capable of doing things that are hard and I will be able to get through it.
Thanks for following along on this long grief journey that will most likely never end. We love you and miss you very much Baba.
Love, Rucha
